Popping the Question

At Kelleher & Associates, our matchmakers don’t just help our clients meet someone special; we can help them through every step of the relationship from the first kiss to the first dance at the wedding. Fact is, in almost 25 years of matchmaking, we’ve seen thousands of couples we matched make it the altar. And, as a result of this experience, we can advise you on creating that perfect proposal.

The moment in which you become engaged is a special one, one the two of you will no doubt be recounting to friends and family for years to come. Keeping that in mind, ask yourself a few questions. How would your future wife (hopefully) want the event to unfold? What are the three words you would like her to use in describing the proposal to others? Let the answers to these questions be your guide in planning your proposal.

Also, be sure to make your proposal not just memorable, but special and romantic. Proposing on a JumboTron at a sporting event is certainly unforgettable but, for many, would also be embarrassing and tacky. The following are some examples of terrific proposals we’ve seen throughout the years:

• He organized a private dinner on a beach at sunset, complete with a string quartet playing background music.
• He put together a dinner party with the same six guests and menu from the dinner party two years earlier where he had taken her on their first date. At the end of the meal, he proposed.
• He paid two photographers to capture the event from a distance with telephoto lenses, and later that night, he presented her with photographs of the proposal.

Now after the proposal (after she’s said “Yes!”), you want to show her that you’re just as excited about your upcoming nuptials as she is. Essentially, the more time you spend together, the more energy and anticipation you will put forth toward your wedding day. After you’ve both finished telling your families and friends the big news, you can work on creating a great after-engagement memory to make the proposal even more special. Here are some of our favorite post-proposal moments we’ve heard from clients:

• He whisked her away to Paris – a romantic classic that never gets old.
• He organized brunch the next morning with her parents (whom he had flown into town) and his parents at a beautiful bay-view restaurant.
• He booked a reservation for the next night at a four-star restaurant with her best friend and his best friend whom would be the matron of honor and best man at their wedding.

We at Kelleher & Associates congratulate you on making the next step, and we wish you well in organizing an unforgettable proposal.

Being More Authentic in 2011

As it’s the start of a new year, it’s natural that everyone’s thinking about their resolutions, ways they can improve in the coming year. At Kelleher & Associates, people often ask us “What are people looking for?” or “How can I be more attractive to a potential match?” Quite honestly, the answers to these rather broad questions vary with each person.

Recently, I read an article in Fortune about authentic leadership. Reading over the characteristics that define an authentic leader, I realized that many of these qualities match the advice we often pass on to our members when asked the questions above.

The article uses the above Venn diagram to show how several attributes must be present in order have a certain quality. For instance, to be considered generous, one must be trustworthy and self-aware. And, in order to be sincere, one must be both trustworthy and transparent. In order to be truly authentic, one must demonstrate self-awareness, trustworthiness and transparency – all key elements in a healthy relationship.

So, if one of your goals of 2011 is to improve your personal and professional relationships, focus on being more authentic by showing others that you are dependable and truthful, truly know yourself including your strengths and weaknesses, and are direct and open.